“An epitaph is a short, sarcastic poem.”
“Poetry is when every line starts with a capital letter and doesn’t reach the right side of the page.”
“Letters in sloping type are in hysterics.”
“An abstract noun is one that cannot be heard, seen, touched or smelled.”
“A consonant is a large piece of land surrounded by water.”
“The adder is a poisonous snack.”
“Pine is an example of a carnivorous tree.”
“If teeth are not cleaned, plague is the result.”
“In the Middle Ages, people lived in mud huts with rough mating on the floor.”
“The seventh commandment is ‘Thou shalt not admit adultery.’”
Source: ‘Must Try Harder! The Very Worst Howlers by Schoolchildren’, by Norman McGreevy